Sleighbells ring......... are you listening?

It's Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it IS the spirit of giving.... So for those who have complained about my last "aunty" entry (Only Eric was kind enough to call it my "martha wanna-be" entry...) here, this entry is for you lovely people who read my blog... :D

So CHRISTMAS!!!! I dont celebrate it in a religious way, but it's hard not to get caught up in the festivities and the end of the year.... everything's winding down, to gear up for a new year ahead. And what a year it will be methinks...

Anyways, whatever the economic situation, since everyone seems to be posting their wish list, I thought I would too.... So here's mine... material things only, cause the intangible thinggies like love and peace and happiness are, although a given, either stuff I need to work on internally or are really beyond my control.... so here goes, my wish list, purely tangible goods and purely frivolous (well some of them are) :-

(i) a hand held mixer

Yes, the auntie in me has surfaced lately... and I'm into baking... for better or worse for my friends and family... cause they end up being my guinea pigs/piggettes. My old mixer, which I loved muchly, given to me by my sis circa 10 birthdays ago finally sputtered coughed keeled over and died. Sigh... that mixer and I have seen so many good memories, so many baking experiments.... so now I'm mixing cake and cookie batter by hand.... and as much as I appreciate a good workout, there's only so much the hand can do, and I have ambitions of baking meringues! pavlovas! and i wanna cream them all to high heaven!!! Top on my "I'm itching to bake" list are (a) Orange poppyseed cake and (b) White chocolate cranberry muffins!!! Nevermind I dont got a muffin tray... sigh...

(ii) a pretty overnight luggage bag

In dark chocolate brown, it lured me from my main purpose that day... and proved to be quite a distraction. But time wouldn't permit me to think properly that day, or I would have bought it. I didn't. And as luck would have it, it was sold out a couple of days later, the only available one being faulty... *&^%$#@$%!!!! I guess I'll just have to keep hunting for this one....

(iii) strappy tan leather heels

It's not easy shopping for shoes when you wear a size 10. So many pretty shoes have eluded me, so much so that I actually have very very happy dreams that I'm shoe shopping, and every shoe I fancy fits!!!! But then, I wake up.... and realise.... DAMN! it's just a dream.... I've got several brown outfits, and I'm wearing my dark brown pair of strappy heels to death now.... they're starting to fade.... and peel... poor things.... So i need a pair brown pair of strappy tan leather heels PRONTO!!!

(iv) THAT dress...

You know the one that you just KNOW is perfect the moment you put it on.... Yeah... I want THAT dress.... so far, I've had a couple of near hits, both tugging with much force at my heart strings, but seeing as my purse strings weren't as easily moved, sigh.... I guess I'll just have to keep hunting!!!!

(v) a sketchbook

A decent sized one I can lug about with me... I've already packed my charcoals and my pencils and some chalk into a pretty zippy soft bag I now carry with me in my weekend bag... So now I want a ring bound sketchbook to put them charcoals, pencils and chalk to good use!!!! And oh.... any willing models??? Now THIS (sketchbook.... sketchbook) I know where to get! haha... mayhaps I'll get it tonite, as little frivolous Christmas gift to myself....

And you know what? Once I started the list, seems I have so MANY things I want!!! So I'll stop here... and end this entry with "HAVE A MERRY, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!"


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Miracle froth...

At the risk of sounding like an auntie…. I’m gonna blog about this.

To remove tough stains on whites (I haven’t tried this on coloured clothes):-

Directly onto the stain, splash some bleach and then some Vanish detergent.

The mixture will turn into a miracle milky froth. Leave the froth on stain for a few minutes, and then rub/scrub gently.

Stain WILL go away.

Even old stubborn ones.

My whites, are white again!!!

Plus, you get super smooth hands after.

(Ignore the redness, and/or stinging sensation…. Acid peel – schmacid schpeel, this works!!!)


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Unspoken Code of Conduct...

It was a lovely weekend girly lunch. One of those long lazy ones with good food, great gossip and better company.

We brought Little A along, and as always, he was a joy to have around, a good little boy who LOVES his clotted cream and jam on scones…..

So the service left much to be desired. But the place was packed, the food was good and we were too busy enjoying ourselves talking anyways.

The afternoon wore on, fantastic roast beef set, a very yummy sandwich, fries and scones scones scones!!!! And like all good things, it had to come to an end…. Plus Little A was getting sleepy…

So we asked for the bill…

It came.

It took me 2 micro-seconds to adjust the look of pleasant surprise on my face…

It was HALF of what I had mentally calculated it to be.

But as much as I tried to adjust my features, I think the waiter caught my look of surprise and proceeded to ask me if it was the “correct bill”.

I shot a quick look of “NO ONE SAY ANYTHING! LET ME HANDLE THIS!” to the girls… and proceeded to confirm in a very dumb blonde fashion….the very few things that we actually DID order and which were reflected in the bill…. He seemed happy, I pulled out some cash and paid the bill.

The waiter obviously didn’t see the big ass plate of roast beef that we had. Yorkshire pudding and all!!! Although one can’t really blame him, we polished everything off!!!

The change came and Ming gave me look of shock … she had the look of “You’re KIDDING me! You only gave him ONE RM50 note and THERE’S CHANGE??!?!?!?”.

I gave her the smallest of nods to indicate things are a-ok and with much haste (using Little A’s falling asleep as an excuse) we left the joint.

In an unspoken code of conduct, understood only amongst people who have been friends for almost 20 years…. none of us mentioned ANYTHING about the bill.

Even outside.

We waited till we were at least 50 metres away…. When I said…. “Oh, by the way, they forgot to charge us for the roast beef set”. (it was the most expensive thing on their menu).

Ming, 8 months pregnant, and carrying her 3 year old son at that point in time, immediately dropped her head, and proceeded to POWER WALK towards the car…. Fiercely whispering “HURRY UP YOU GUYS!!! WALK!!!!!”

Makes me wonder what kind of role models we are for a 3 year old… but then again, he’s 3, he was half asleep and we may have saved RM40 but the buzz of excitement, the good 10 minutes of hysterical unexplained laughter we indulged in on the way home…. was PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!! We’ll worry about morals when he gets a little older I guess….

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Vindicated!!!! (The Heat is On – Part 2)

I AM NOT BLONDE! *doing twirly dance of joy*

And I have proof!

My radiator DID go bust on me!

It cost me a little more than RM200 to get my cracked radiator fixed, and I am happy. Cause this means that I am NOT one of those clueless lady drivers!!! (contrary to WHATEVER the Nut chooses to write on HIS blog).

The Bookermobile is doing her thing on the road again :D

Feeling very proud and walking around with my head held high KNOWING that I have irrefutable evidence that I am NOT blonde…..I got a call :-

J : Hello, how’s your car?

Booker: Ok. It didn’t blow up. Just a cracked radiator.
It’s all fixed now. Only cost me RM210!
*grin*

[yes, I grin into phones… I believe a grin adds depth to any phone conversation]

J : Oh good. So you got the car back now?

Booker : Yup. She came back last nite.
*smug look on face*

J : Great! Did you check the radiator water level?

Booker : *blink*

J : Hello?

Booker : *frowns*

J : *tilts his head to a side, shaking it slowly* <-- [I just KNOW he did it]

Booker: …no….. THEY FIXED IT ALREADY MA!!!!!!!!!!! *pout*

J : *sigh*


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The Heat is On!

The radiator heat-o-meter gauge thingy on my car decided to start climbing the other day…. And it was just a short trip to the pasar malam…. To get some tau foo far….. but it was late, and all I actually DID manage to get was a healthy splatter of fish guts water from the friendly toothless fishmonger….. sigh….. must be my old ratty t-shirt….. but I digress….

So smelling like yesterday’s catch, I got back to my car….and drove home. 100 meters from home, I noticed the radiator heat-o-meter gauge thing going up…. Hmmm not a good sign…. I’m no car expert, but I know enough of its mechanics to know that the gauge thingy should never be higher than the middle line…. And that your eyebrow should rise progressively with the gauge…. And so… following that rule of thumb, I had the look of sheer HORROR frozen on my face by the time I got home!!!!

Alarm bells ringing…I rush home, opened the bonet and did an expert STARE.

*PHEW* nothing blew up….

And my look of sheer HORROR relaxed to one of just SHOCK.

Next…. I did the most Macguyver thing I could think of…… I checked the water tank thingy next to the radiator…..

And Lo and Behold!!!! My look of SHOCK turned into one of SURPRISED SHOCK! (with exclamation mark!).

The water tank with plastic hose tube thingy was EMPTY! Dry as the sahara…..

That’s what you get I suppose for not really checking…. My poor car!

So I filled her up…. Could her the hiss as the first drops hit the radiator while I was filling in the tank… aiyoh…. How my heart ached…. Sigh….

So problem solved! My look of SURPRISED SHOCK! slowly relaxed to one of CONCERN.

Concern over my TYPICAL LADY DRIVER-ness….. sigh….

*Fast forward a few days…*

So my car ran pretty much like normal after that…. For a few days….

Then Saturday came along…. And I was designated driver for my parents’ errand running.

Of course it HAD to be a scorcher of a day…..

And 30 mins into driving around town, I noticed that I was looking MILDLY SURPRISED when I checked myself in the mirror….. asked myself why…. And then glanced the way of the radiator heat-o-meter gauge thingy…DAMN! It was rising again….

40 mins into driving and it had gone ¾ way up…. That’s when the (by now kinda familiar) SHEER LOOK OF HORROR plastered itself on my face….

And, as if for good measure, I realized that we were NO WHERE close to home yet….. another 20 mins of driving lay ahead of me….. and half of that, was me being held up by red lights and traffic snarls…..

By then, I had passed the SHEER LOOK OF HORROR line and my face was slowly arranging itself into the *^%$&^%$^*&^%@ (in Hokkien – we WERE driving around Klang) KILL ME NOW look…

I declared it DefCon 5 there and then…… Heart racing, body leaning forward, I stared, sulked, scowled, motioned impatiently, swore at and almost spat at anything in my way of home…. It wasn’t one of my prettiest moments in life I must say….

Reached home…. The gauge was just touching the red zone…… I IMMEDIATELY popped the bonet, and caught of whiff of “burnt something”…. Oh NO!!!!!!!!!!!

No staring this time….. I went into auto-pilot and reached for the garden hose….. and hosed my car’s insides down…. (Flashback :I have an uncle who used to run a chicken farm… and on hot days, he’d hose the crates and crates of chickens in his lorry down…to cool them down, so that they don’t DIE……... Same logic applied here…..)

Everything the water touched under the car bonet sizzled and spat angrily. Steam rose, and I continued swearing in my bad Hokkien (in my head…. I have very decent neighbours)…

10 mins into hosing, and the insides of my car STILL steamed and sizzled…. I was almost in tears by then….. firstly for my car and secondly for my bad Hokkien….

After flooding the garden…. And deciding that my car’s not going to blow up…. I stood there and inspected the water tank thingy. Empty. Again!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

SHOOT! Something’s leaking…. DAMN!

I knew that I needed to get her checked….. but logic dictated that I let her cool down a bit….. so I went into the house, decided I needed some cooling down too….. made myself an apple vodka cocktail and slept.

*Approximately 2 hours later*

I woke up, inspected the car….. still hadn’t blown up… phew! And drove to the mechanic, 5 mins away.

I walked up to the foreman and in my embarrassingly halting Hokkien somehow managed to convey the message that my radiator almost blew up.

He looked at the car, then suspiciously at me… and then opened up the water tank thingy. It was FULL. (I smiled smugly and he softened his gaze at me)…. Next he opened up the radiator cap….. and started frowning. He stuck his finger into the mouth of the radiator then looked up at me questioningly. I of course looked back at him even MORE questioningly….

He then took a deep deep breath… and asked very very s-l-o-w-l-y…… if I had filled water into the radiator recently.

No. I answered.

He then asked, again very slowly, when was the LAST time I filled water into the radiator.

Oh. You’re SUPPOSED to fill in water into the radiator? I asked.

I was about to tell him that I had NEVER done anything of the sort cause the radiator cap tells me in BIG RED WARNING letters “DO NOT OPEN!” (and in much smaller letters “while hot”) And since I fill up the water tank thingy regularly… like when it dries up……. But I didn’t have to say anything…

I guess my earlier answer made it clear just what he was dealing with….. such instinct! Must be the 30 years of experience as a foreman….

Anyways, he patiently filled up my radiator. It took him 2 trips with a big ass 5 litre bottle to fill it up…. And then he let the engine run for a good 10 mins…. All the while checking, sometimes half diving into the bonet with his flash light, sometimes ducking under my car…checking and re-checking.

After that, we turned to me and said very patiently, that there was nothing wrong with my car. No leaks, no cracks. Just an empty radiator….. (and a dumb owner) ß no, he didn’t say it… out loud at least.

The wash of relief over me that instant was overshadowed only by the sudden feeling of being INCREDIBLY DUMB standing there, talking to the very very patient foreman, who never once made any snide remarks, or crack any “typical lady driver” jokes….

He didn’t even charge me for his meticulous checking and 2 trips of water that day.

Sigh. So I’m relieved. Cause my car didn’t blow up… and I don’t really have to drive around with the SHEER LOOK OF HORROR on my face no more…. Phew!

Squiggly little thing.....

What is it about squiggly things?????

So there we were, happy with our purchases…. From two warehouse sales located a stone’s throw from each other… when we decided to have Korean for dinner.

Nice.

So we got in the car, she and I, and tailed Betsy to Kota Damansara.

You would think tailing a bright turquoise Gen 2 amongst the more generic silver, gray and black cars whizzing about PJ would be a brainless, minimal concentration task wouldn’t you?

Not that day.

Nothing to do with his (I don’t even need to mention his name… who ELSE has a turquoise blue Gen -2 named Betsy?) as always, pristinely kept car, but focusing on Betsy proved a bit of a task that day…..cause something else caught my eye…..

Parked under some trees while we shopped, my car had become a landing spot for a myriad of things….. little yellow leaves, some crinkly twigs and what I thought was bird poop. A white tube like deposit, which landed smack in the centre of MY half of the windscreen…..

“Great!!!” I thought…..yet another reason for people to get me to wash my car….

I usually ignore bird poop and the likes, wherever it lands on my car….. so I did just that…. Until 200 metres out of my parking spot, the white tube like piece of what I thought of shit, started to MOVE…….. it wiggled, then wriggled and then did a double back flip and triple tuck dive to the bottom on my windscreen!!!!

It was then that I noticed it’s legs….. and it’s soft segmented body….. that wasn’t bird poop!!!! It was a soft squishy white baby caterpillar!!!!!!!!!!!!

My neck muscles immediately tensed up…..it was soft, wriggly and white…. And it was hanging on to its dear life, just where my wipers were……

I tried focusing on Betsy……

But I couldn’t. I kept looking at it’s wriggly body and it’s little nubs for legs!!!!!!!!!!

Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!

To be fair to the little thing, it wasn’t ugly or horrible in any way, it’s just that nature had made it soft, cold and squishy… with little nubs for legs……… and it was ON MY WINDSCREEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stiff necked, eyes on it’s nubbly legs, I said to She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named…

Booker : “I’m seriously disturbed by the little white caterpillar on my windscreen!!!”

She-who-shall-
Not-be-named : “Haiyah just ignore it la!!!! Let me read you my favourite line from this Bill
Bryson book I got for a steal at MPH”

And she proceeds to flip through her book and actually reads me a couple of lines from the book….

She may as well have been doing the hustle and singing me opera… I couldn’t focus……..


Booker : “I SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY am disturbed by the little white caterpillar on
my windscreen!!!!!”


She-who-shall-
Not-be-named : “Ignore it”

Booker : “I can’t”

And before I can tell her of my plan to pull over when I saw some trees of similar make to the ones I was parked under earlier, and very Macguyver-ishly use a twig to flick the soft little nubbly thing onto a low branch where it can live happily ever after……… She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named reaches over, and nonchalantly FLICKS ON MY WIPERS!!!! :-


The next few minutes of what happened in the Bookermobile have been censored for the safety and sanity of all reading this blog….


But for those who don’t really have much sanity to begin with, read on….


ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE!!!! The moment the wipers started moving upwards, the poor little caterpillar’s body got caught in it and was squished, mashed, and squeezed between the wiper and the windscreen….. it’s bodily juices were smeared and splattered on my windscreen… in a graceful up down quarter circular motion……. REPEATEDLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”


I have to squeeze my eyes shut as I type this…… the muscles at the back of my neck are tense and I have the heebie-jeebies all over me!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!

The poor caterpillar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the midst of the pandemonium -> Loosely translated to me devastatedly screaming “Arrrgghhh!!!” (pls see above) pretty much to the rhythm of the wipers, Ms. She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named took one look at the crime scene on my windscreen, and BROKE OUT INTO HYSTERIAL LAUGHTER!!!!! I now know what cackling like a witch sounds like…..

I was so disturbed……

But I think Ms. She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named felt a little remorse after we stopped the car. For she got out of the car, immediately whisked out some tissues, and cleared all evidence of the murder that had occurred on the sprint highway that day………..

I am still disturbed………

*shudder*


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Little Hugo II

For 3 minutes, he did nothing but run up, along, above, behind, on and down my computer screen.

No bigger than a staple, his exo-skeleton was half brown and half translucent and he was just taking his late morning walkabout the office he's come to call home.

Lovely little thing....

Don't Say It - Update

I am bursting with pride here.

Dinner with Khims, Ming and Little Aiden last Saturday couldn't have been better. Cause the Little Car Inspector proclaimed my car to be "CLEAN". Said with conviction and happy approval.

I love that kid.

*humming a happy tune*

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A year older....

A year older last Saturday.

So much to live for.
So much to be thankful for.

And so, so much to learn.

Live and learn, live and be thankful.

Don't Say It!!!!!!

It was a typical girly yum-cha session…. Only the girls are in their thirties… and there’s simply no denying the thirties bit with an adorable little tot tagging along, him hugging his little blue elephant...

We settled in the makan place and ordered a LOT.

And as is mandatory with all girly session, we talked….. and talked… and talked….

He kept himself happy mucking about the booth seat, scrambling close to the cascading water feature and excitedly pointing out the “pond”. So easy to keep a 3 year old happy… (I can already hear Ah Ming going “You wait…. Wait till he’s in one of his MOODS!”

But he was so adorable that day.

And he was such a good boy, even when presented with a whole fish pond to conquer and explore….. with mummy and Auntie J letting their feet be fish fodder for the day…. And when he had that little piece of chocolate…. How his eyes lit up!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, and utterly ADORABLE!!!!!

Until of course….. dear ole me dropped him and mummy off….

He got out of the car…. Turned and looked at my tyres…..STUNNED!!!!!!

He did NOT blink…. He did NOT move…. He merely looked, and ever so slowly lifted his blue elephant free hand, pointed to my back car tyre and said…

“Mummy……. Joycelyn che-che’s car…… so…. so…..so…..”

Armed with instinct only a mother would have…. Ah Ming looked at her son, horrified….. and warned him….

“Aiden…. DON’T SAY IT!”

But he was too stunned, too transfixed to hear her….

“Mummy!!!!!… It’s so… so… so….”

Again, in the mummy-est tone she could muster, all the while giving me a helpless “oh-God-my-son’s-gonna-say-it look” …

“Aiden, DON’T! Come, hold Mummy’s hand, let’s go into the house…”

With a slight furrow on his ridiculously baby smooth forehead… he SAID it..

“DIRTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Ah Ming’s gasp of disbelief could be heard for a 1 km radius… hahahaha!!!!

I was tickled pink!!!!

Said with so much innocence…. And with such shock!!!! Like he couldn’t believe that tyre rims COULD get to that particular shade of dirty brownish black….

I sincerely hope the poor little thing didn’t have nightmares…..

So, being the responsible Auntie that I am, yesterday, I am SO DAMN PROUD TO SAY….. I squatted by all 4 tyres, effectively cutting off all circulation to both limbs, and scrubbed my tyre rims clean. They are a sparkly silver now……

I am so PROUD…. and my legs are fine thanks….

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Monday....

I woke up feeling tired today...


Amidst the usual sounds of the morning, I paused for 15 minutes, listening to the world go by.


I look in the mirror and see the dark circles, the pale complexion, the tired eyes.


My back's achy and my tummy's sulking...


Only means 1 thing....yep, *sigh* it's Monday....

Emily Diet - NOT Day!!!!

I actually DO HAVE the discipline to see the Emily Diet through, unlike the Eric Diet where one only needs ONE bad virus attack, the Emily Diet needs patience, discipline and will of steel (I have never willed myself to faint this much in my life.... ever)!

But, having all the discipline, will and patience is ONE thing..... having parents that think anything less than a double chin means "YOU'RE STARVING!!!!!" doesn't really help either....

Classic case of Emily Diet-Not happened just this morning....

I'm asleep, when at 8.40am my mom comes pounding on my room door "WAKE UP!!! I MADE BREAKFAST!!!!!"

And I'm a morning person, cause of this wonderful inducement called breakfast..... so I hop gleefully out of bed and practically dance my way to the dining table.

There, she's cooked up some super kickass mee suah, dry version, swimming in lard oil, generously covered with stir-fried black sauce minced pork and garlic, blanketting strips and strips of prawn omelette.... yum-YUMMY-yum-YUM!!!!!!!!!

The loveliest thing to wake up to is Mum's cooking really..... espcially if she cooks anything with stir-fried black sauce minced pork with garlic.... It's one thing savouring stir-fried black sauce minced pork with garlic first thing in the morning, which is great, but the real BLISS comes from getting to burp stir-fried black sauce minced pork with garlic THE WHOLE DAY LONG!!!!!!!!!!! aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh *big happy smile*

Anyways, how easily I digress..... back to the Emily Diet- NOT incident, there I was, happily napping for another 30 mins after I wiped the pork flavoured oil slick on my morning face, when I hear my father coming home from his morning "lim-teh" session. (See how I'm trying to meng-Hokkienise this blog?) And with him, he's bought.... sigh.... ONLY MY SECOND FAVOURITEST FOOD IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mee hoon kueh!!!!!!!

Ahhhhhhh ...... the unmistakable smell of ikan bilis broth, still piping hot, the crispy ikan bilis and fried onions, the smooth pieces of carbs floating between pieces of sliced pig.... YUM!!!!!!!

So deciding there and then that this was going to be an Emily Diet - NOT day, I dig in, intending only to "taste" the soup....and okay, MAYBE a couple of slices of "mee hoon kueh"..... budden... before I know it, 90% of the bowl's gone!!!!!

I really should learn to focus..... between eating my mee hoon kueh, talking to my parents and reading the papers, I somehow auto-pilotted myself into finishing most of my food!!!!

So, no Emily today.

But BOY AM I HAPPY!!!!! :D:D:D:D

Olympic Dreams....

It was immediately after the much anticipated singles men's badminton Olympic final, battle for GOLD!!! Lin Dan had just beaten our Lim Chong Wei in straight sets, without even breaking a sweat... sigh.....

The tv was still flashing Lin Dan's emotional outburst after he'd won, music akin to "charriots of fire" <-- China version playing in the background, replaying the scene where he gets up from the badminton court, and rushes to his coaches, giving them a big BIG hug and sobbing into their sportjackets.....

When my phone rings....

It's Ah Ming.

She's laughing uncontrollably into the phone.... and I'm thinking she's lost a couple of marbles cause Malaysia's NOT getting that golden public holiday....

But that really wasn't the case.

She was laughing herself silly cause of this this :-


Caught up in the victorious Olympic gold medal moment of Lin Dan and his coaches after watching the match, Little A (her 3 year old son) ran up to her and her husband and asked for a "hug-hug".... (Awwwwwwwww...)

Hearts melted as only a parent's heart can when a child shows such displays of pure love and affection, the following conversation ensued :-

Father : Aww, Little A, do you wanna go to the Olympics???

Little A : I want!!!

Mother : You do? What do you want to do at the Olympics???

(Hearts beaming with love, pride, and ambition for their little boy, both parents looked lovingly at their potential Olympic champion, waiting for his answer....)

Little A : Mop floor.


I think i dropped my phone then..... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Hey, at least he wants to do it at the OLYMPICS!!!!

Hokkien, you gotta love it.. (Part 2)

I've been laughed at (yes, all you evil people who made fun of my Hokkien speaking abilities...... ) and been the butt of jokes about my command of the language for YEARS now (all in good humuor, thankfully).

So recently, I've been putting a bit of effort in making myself speak Hokkien a bit more frequently, like once every month, specifically when ordering bah kut teh (no greens, it is SO WRONG bunny!) or spare rib rice. Nevermind that people INSIST that one never really speaks in hokkien, one SHOUTS it, or HOLLERS it. And it is not uncommon for the non-Hokkien speaking crowd to huddle together in fear while traversing the streets of my beloved Hokkien speaking town, for to their untrained ears, "EVERYONE'S FIGHTING!!!!!".

I love Klang, and it's dialect of choice, so I pooh-poohed their naivette, and took to my Hokkien speaking lessons seriously.

And in my quest, I've googled my dad many a time for the Hokkien version of a certain word.

Usually, my dad, being a fine, true blue, born and bred in Klang specimen, will answer me INSTANTANEOUSLY, sometimes with a bemused look on his face (accompanied by a little chuckle) and sometimes with a "where did I go wrong educating this child of mine" look (accompanied by a sad shake of the head). Well... some of the words are pretty basic, I AM in my thirties, and he IS a teacher.....sigh.

But ONCE and only ONCE did one of my "how do you say this in Hokkien" queries stump him.

I mean, he was literally, at a loss for words.

I did my usual "how do you say [word] in Hokkien?" thing on him and expected him to answer in an instant.

He didn't.

Instead, he put down his chopsticks (yes, we DO love our food in Klang), pondered for a full 10 seconds, looked this way and that, looked staight at me with a "I CANT BELIEVE THIS" look on his face and said very gently, "In the Hokkien language, there is no such word".

Everyone around the dining table stopped eating. Too stunned to do or say anything.

The word I asked him about?

"Please".

Hokkien, you GOTTA love it!!!

Hokkien, gotta love it! (Part 1)

They're talking about the hokkien language on the Nut's blog today....

I live in Klang, and it's almost a natural guaranteed consequence that I am Hokkien (which I am).

But, like the Nut, both my parents are English teachers (retired now) and we never had any grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins or such living with us. Just the Booker brood.

So growing up, I never had to speak anything else but English to be understood. Even in school, everyone spoke English.

And as a natural almost guaranteed consequence of that, I dont really speak Hokkien.

I mean I DO speak it, only I cant say that anyone in Klang (or in any other hokkien speaking province) will understand it.....

Booker : Pappy! Wa lang kha tan ai khe to lok ah?
[Pappy! Where are we going later?]

Pappy : (*Pained look on his face*)
Khe chiak ming kia lor
[To eat lor]

Booker : Khe tolok chiak? Ho chiak boh....

(and i go on to rattle on in what i thought was pretty good Hokkien, feeling rather proud of my hokkien heritage... when my dad stops me midsentence, wearing an expression like he just heard fingernails on a whiteboard....)

Pappy : Speak in English *term of endearment for me*................ Please........ speak in English.


Sigh...

Sleeeeeeeeeeeeepy

Zzzzzzz.........zz..........z..............................zzzzzzzz.

(I wonder if this counts as a blog entry?)

Pictures on my blog…

I’ve been asked many times….“Why no pictures in your blog?”

So today I decided I shall post some pictures on my blog.

I took the effort to find and then bring to the office the cable thingy to transfer some shots from my handphone to the computer.

Plug this to that, and click “ok” to everything rite??!?!

WRONG!

No one told me anything about a cd.

The one containing the programme I would need to transfer the files from…… zzzzzzzzzz…….

Seriously…. TOO MUCH EFFORT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Goodbye Patchee....

We used to watch the sunsets together. I’d prop myself up onto my mother’s car boot, and he’d climb up next to me, cuddle up close and in silence, lend his unconditional support to me.

He used to be able to give me looks. Looks that would silently put me in place, looks that would wrench the very heart out of me, looks that will flood me with shame. Always silent, he didn’t need words to convey these emotions, his looks were enough.

Silently defiant as always, he was never one who complained. Even as a little thing, the first night we brought him home, separated from the comfort of his familiar surroundings, he didn’t let out a peep. He grew up strong and silent, even when he came back with the most horrible battle wounds, gored, skin ripped apart , these nasty open wounds were all silently endured. He never squirmed or complained when we dressed his wounds, even in the unfamiliar hands of the vet, he merely plopped himself down, turned his body to make access to the wounded bits of him easier, with nary a wince. The trust he had is us was complete and unquestioning.

He had his flaws. Not born to be a show dog (perhaps, the fault for that was ours to share, we never really trained him to be one… I’m sure he would have done great, when the mood struck him). He ran out, terrorized the neighbours and many a postman.

He was special. The best watch dog anyone could ask for. He’s the only dog we had (and we’ve had dogs since I can recall), which could climb on top cars and keep watch from there. Trust me, it IS very intimidating to have him bark at you from ground level, it’s something else to have him bark at you from on top of the car, as if he could leap off the top of the car, fly above the gate and come lunging directly at your jugular. Scary indeed.

But he was a sweetheart. As standoffish and unaffectionate as he may seem, he really was a big devoted furball inside. He’d nuzzle up for a quick pet every chance he got. He’s walk regally up to me the moment I got home and stand next to me, looking quietly at me, until I reach down and give him a “Hey boy, I’m home” pet. Then he’d walk protectively behind me, until I let myself in the house.

His devotion knew no end. He’d plonk himself on his belly right at our doorstep, and silently watch us from his panda marked eyes for hours on end. Watching us watching tv was his favourite past time. And we knew he was watching us, cause you only need to nod in his direction, and that tail will start wagging…. Look at him and smile, and he’d smile back (I swear, he could smile…) wagging his tail happily. Get up to get a glass of water, and he’d get up too. By the time you reach the kitchen and reach for a glass, he’s already at the back door, watching out for you.

I’m gonna miss you Patchee ole’ boy. 14 years of being together and suddenly you’re gone. I’ll miss your slow and steady regal walk. I’ll miss hearing you take your running start, and the clickity clack of your paws on the windshield, I’ll miss your silent nuzzles and most of all, my dear dear friend, I’ll miss our sunsets together.

I still glance by your usual hang out spot near the custard apple tree every morning. I still listen out at night for the sounds of you scrambling up my car. And then I see the wilted flowers in the garden, marking your resting place, and it hits me. You’re gone. Rest in peace Patchee, I’ll miss you.

Fire!!!!!

Well not quite…. It was more of a smoke gets in your eyes… hair…. clothes….pores of skin affair…

But smoke there was….

We were on our way back to his place, after dinner and we smelt smoke… it didn’t raise any alarm bells then cause it was more like an “Oh dear… someone left the chicken on the stove a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit too long” kind smell…..

We reach the door and notice that things were kind blur….. hazy blur….. we peeped into the neighbour’s (yes, we’re nosy) and WHOAAAAAAAAAAAA smoke billowing out from the kitchen….. we leaned over the railing into the airwell to get a better view of the neighbour’s kitchen and spy a pot of something which was once boiling merrily away, was now burning red hot and spewing smoke like krakatao….

We sprang into action… *mission impossible theme song playing in mind*

We knocked, hollered, yelled.

The only one who answered was the neighbour’s dog…. And it kept barking… alternating between the kitchen then at us… the poor thing knew something was amiss but could do nothing.

He tried calling the neighbour…. No answer.

I kept yelling.... No answer.

So what were we to do? Smoke filling our lungs… (it was lotus root and spare ribs soup flavoured… of course, very very well done), he made to get the security guard, and I, acting on instinct, reached in through the grilles and started blind feeling the wall next to the door. I molested the wall a little bit and just as I was about to give up, the tips of my fingers touched metal… it chinked and rattled at my touch. I lean forward some more (my poor boobs) and Lo! And Behold! I felt the unmistakable touch of a bunch of keys!!!

Heart racing and adrenalin pumping I turn to him and say “Wait…I think I can reach the keys.”

Without hesitation (or any thought to the criminal sentence which carries a jail term for breaking and entering and how NICE it would look on both of our records (we’re both lawyers….) he answered “Grab them!”

So grab them I did (for the record, I was acting ENTIRELY on his instruction, and my judgement was clouded by lotus root smoke).

And they WERE the keys to the house. I opened the grille and we jumped into action.

“Grab the dog” he told me.

(Sure, sure…. Leave it to the girl to wrestle the agitated dog, with sharp teeth and all….)

So I opened the grille cautiously, by this time, the smoke had made everything slightly cloudy, and the other neighbour had come out to see what the commotion was all about… and I slowly but firmly carry the dog in my arms….ok… so Bubbles is a chocolate coloured little toy poodle with oodles and oodles of baby soft poofy fur… BUT IT STILL HAD TEETH!!!!

And the moment I had Bubbles in my arms, he flashed right by me and dog directly to the kitchen…

By the time I got there, still carrying Bubbles, he had already turned off the flames and was taking the super heated pot of charcoaled lotus root to the sink.

Lots of sizzling and hissing and more smoke later, we stood there… kinda amazed at what just happened, my mind filled with thoughts of the penal code, breaking and entering….prison…the criminal and civil suits that may follow, and I could tell he thought it too… second only to the boyish excitement plastered all over his face!!! And just as we were about to make a break for it….. (I was wondering if I’d have enough reach to be able to hook them keys back, when Ms Neighbour came bounding into her unit.

She was all flummoxed and flustered.

“I left the fire on!!!”
“I’ve been calling my *^$%*%*& brother but he didn’t answer the phone!!!”
“Thanks, you guys!!! I rushed back as soon as I could!!!”

To this, a wash of relief flooded over me… Good…. She’s not gonna bring an action against us….

I give her dog back to her and explain to her that we tired calling her and yelling for someone to open the door…

She nodded gratefully and thanked us profusely again..

Good, I thought. She suspects nothing. We were making our way out, hoping to hell we wouldn’t have to explain how the hell we managed to get in… when she asked “So how did you guys get in? You forced the grilled open?”

We looked guiltily at each other, and in an act of pure chivalry, he pointed to me and said “She did it”.

Thanks man.

I had to explain to her what I did…. And lest she thought I was some criminal minded habitual house breaker, I had to explain to her that we hung the keys in similar fashion at home (well not quite… we kinda have a key basket….) and that I used to do the same stretch and feel thing to let myself in to the house when I get locked out….

She smiled and nodded. I could tell she wasn’t quite buying it…

Crap. That’s it.

If she avoids me on the street next time I see her….. I’ll know if I have the “bad ass criminal look” about me…. Sigh….

But trepidation, adrenalin rush, breaking and entering and dog wrestling aside, I must admit, IT WAS FUN!!!!!!!!!!! And I can only say this because no one got hurt, except maybe some blackened lotus roots… sure we smelt smoky after that…. And I’m sure Bubbles and it’s owner will never see me in the same light again… but there IS this special chest-proudly-out, walking on sunshine feeling that comes with being self professed heroes…. Even if it’s only for 5 minutes, and even if the only thing you manage to rescue were some lotus roots from becoming charcoal…. It was FUN!!!!

Plus, it’s something to blog about.. :P

For you Yin...

For the benefit of Yin, who can't access my friendster blog from the office, I'm posting my latest entry on the Booker Blogs here too... and perhaps, all of my blog entries... we'll see :D

Hope you enjoy the entries Yin.

Happy Birthday Cha!

She flies back to london today... morning flight. weird but i was missing her since yesterday evening already, with her sitting just inches from me.....but i missed her the most the first 5 mins driving away from the airport. the brave front i put up at the departure hall crumbled the moment i was in the privacy of my car.... i cried.... i ALMOST bawled but the realisation that i was headed directly for the office helped. it's not so bad now... but i miss her...

hope she gets to her place in london safe and sound.

Write off......

Everyone has write off days.... you know the kind that start off slow, you never get into gear, where the most mundane of things seem SO important??? like you simply HAVE to count the paperclips in your drawer before anything else days.... so today is a write off day for me.... It's a work day, I came into the office, and in a bit, I will be punching out and leaving the office..... where did all the hours go????

The Blearghs

I have a slight case of the Blearghs today....(some call it the "blahs")....i think it's something a little less than an actual case of the blues but you feel a little useless, a little bored and a little uninspired all at the same time....

I've decided that this blog shall have entries that are little thoughtlets (a.k.a little random thoughtless thoughts).

Dont nobody worry about me.... the blearghs will disappear when I remove myself from these 4 walls of the office.... it's Friday anyways..... and 5.30pm couldn't come sooner!

Simply because...

Another blog???

As if I blog THAT persistently.... but i think the "B" in the orange box is pretty cool to have next to my name when I enter comments on the Nut's blog... so there... reason enough to have another blog :)